The bride came down the aisle and when she reached the altar, the groom was standing there with his golf bag and clubs at his side.
She said:” What are your golf clubs doing here”?
He looked her right in the eye …. and said, “This isn’t going to take all day, is it?”
He couldn’t ad-lib a fart after a baked-bean dinner.
– Johnny Carson (about Chevy Chase)
He was as great as a man can be without morality.
– Alexis de Tocqueville
Quotes and Sayings
There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. -Ben Williams
The higher a monkey climbs, the more you see of its behind.
– Joseph Stilwell
Why, this fellow don’t know any more about politics than a pig knows about Sunday.
– Harry S Truman (about Dwight D. Eisenhower)
Bikers Against Diabetes
She got her good looks from her father. He’s a plastic surgeon.
– Groucho Marx