I’m worried about the staff at my new HMO – do these seem right to you?

HMO clinical definitions: 

Benign…………….What you be after you be eight. 

Bacteria……………Back door to cafeteria. 
Barium……………..What you do with dead folks. 
Cesarean Section…….A neighborhood in Rome. 
Catscan…………….Searching for the cat. 
Cauterize……….Made eye contact with her. 
Colic……………A sheep dog. 
Coma……………A punctuation mark. 
D&C…………….Where Washington is.

Dilate………….To live longer than your kids do. 
Enema………….Not a friend. 
Fester…………Quicker than someone else. 
Fibula…………A small lie. 
G.I.Series………World Series of military baseball. 
Hangnail………..What you hang your coat on. 
Impotent………..Distinguished, well known. 
Labor Pain……….Getting hurt at work. 
Morbid…………..A higher offer than I bid. 
Nitrates…………Cheaper than day rates. 
Medical Staff…….A Doctor’s cane, sometimes shown with a snake.

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